"I don't want to make an entrance"

I had been offering to take mom to Church for the Christmas music since Friday. She couldn't decide if she wants to go, didn't know what she had that she could wear, what the weather was going to be like etc., etc., etc. Last night she told Val she would like to go, so Val went to Meadowlark and got the appropriate wardrobe to include, coat & scarf, gloves & hat, boots & shoes, pants & blazer. When I called her at 8 this morning she said she still wanted to go and was in fact dressed and ready. When I said I'd be there between 9 and 9:30 she pointed out that church didn't start until 10:30, but she would be ready.

When I arrived at Heartland, I told her it would be a good idea to get to church early because of the crowd and we could grab the handicapped parking spot nearest the door. She was going through her wallet, needed to go to the bathroom, hadn't put on her boots or shoes, but she was ready to go. Her shoes and boots wouldn't fit over her socks, she put on her support hose. Her boots wouldn't fit, but her shoes did. Then she was off to the bathroom with me suggesting she might want to step it up to avoid making an entrance. The response is the title of todays posting, imagine the tone of voice.

We were finally able to leave shortly after 10 and arrived at FCC about 20 after 10. After getting her into her chair, receiving assistance from someone to get her into church and finally finding a parking place she got there just as the choir was entering the sanctuary. She didn't want to make an entrance.

Sitting in the back of the church she acknowledged waves, smiles and greetings from a number of her friends, enjoyed the program. I was able to get her out into the hallway before everyone started to leave. An effort was made to place her out of the way of traffic where she could see everyone and everyone could see her. It worked for a while. She held court and received greetings for a number of people and enjoyed sharing her recent experiences with whomever would listen. Several friends shared with me they encouraged her to move in to assisted living, that she really shouldn't be alone and how nice it was to see her in church. I've been booked for next Sunday now as well. June Hall and I joked that we could have left, had lunch and come back and she wouldn't have even noticed.

After a drive through the cemetery and down Rochester road, we stopped at Nino Salvaggio's so I could check out a rumored sighting of Alexander Hornug lunch meats. To my surprise, I was able to score some smoked onion liver sausage, but no rye bread. Croissants did just fine. This prompted a whole new chapter for conversation when we returned to Heartlad. The staff quickly made themselves scarce.

Byron and Colleen came by while we were out and brought clean clothes and left a note. Mom was sorry we missed them as was I.

She continues to vascilate between knowing she needs to go into assisted living and the belief that she will be able to go home soon. Denial is so strong. I hope she listens to what her friends have been saying, what the staff here has been saying and maybe even to what her children have been saying. Okay, I'll settle for two out of the three.

Have A Great Day